Confirm if you can have the papers mailed (served by mail)
You cannot always have papers served by mail. Sometimes they must be served in person.
You generally can have the papers served by mail if:
- You're the Petitioner (the one who first filed papers starting the case) and your spouse or other parent filed a Response
- You're the Respondent in the case
You can have a request to change a judgment or final order about child custody, visitation, or support served by mail if either:
- You are asking to change a judgment or permanent child support order only and the local child support agency (also called the Dept. of Child Support Services or DCSS) is involved in the case. Get instructions on how to serve DCSS.
- You've confirmed in the last 30 days that the address you’re using for mail service is the other side’s current home or work address in one of these ways:
- You contacted the other side in the last 30 days and they gave you this address directly
- You’ve been at that address in the last 30 days for custody, visitation, or other reasons
- It’s the address the other side gave the court in a change of address form MC-040 or some other filing with the court
- You sent a letter to the other side at that address in the last 30 days with a return receipt requested and the other side signed the receipt and accepted your letter
- Or in some other way that confirms to the court that the address you have is the right address for the other side.
When you use this method to serve the other side by mail, you will have to fill out and file a Declaration Regarding Address Verification (form FL-334) together with the Proof of Service by Mail (form FL-335). If you cannot use this form, then you will need to have the papers personally served.
However, your server must use personal service in any of these situations:
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Your spouse or the other parent did not file a response to the Petition and your case is not final (there is no judgment)
If you have not served your Petition yet, your server can serve the Request for Order with your Petition and Summons.
- The judge granted a temporary emergency order on form FL-305 which you’re now serving with your Request for Order. Get instructions to serve an emergency order.
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You're asking to change long-term spousal support. Get instructions to serve a request to change long-term support
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The court ordered personal service
If you’re not sure if the court ordered personal service, look at the bottom of page 1 of your Request. See if box 7 is checked or if the judge wrote in Box 8 to personally serve papers.
Learn how to serve your Request using personal service
If you are not required to use personal service, you can have the papers served by mail.
How to serve your Request by mail
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Choose a server
You can't serve papers yourself. Ask another adult – a server – to mail the papers.
Your server must be:
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18 or over, and
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Not part of your case
Your server can be someone you know or a professional process server you pay.
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Figure out the deadline to serve
Unless the court orders a different time to serve, your server must mail the papers at least 16 court days plus 5 calendar days before your court date.
A court day is a day the court is open (Monday through Friday, excluding court holidays (opens in a new tab)).
Take out a calendar and find your court date (it’s listed on the first page of your Request for Order).
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Count backwards on the calendar 16 court days (Monday to Friday, not including any court holidays). Your court date is not counted (so it’s day “0”).
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When you get to the 16th day, count back 5 calendar days (these can be weekends or holidays)
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Check what day this is:
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If it’s not a holiday or weekend, that’s your deadline.
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If it’s a Saturday or Sunday or court holiday, count back to a day that court would be open, that’s your deadline.
Your server needs to mail the papers before this date.
Out-of-State: Mail the papers 16-court days plus 10 calendar days before your court date
Outside the United States: Mail the papers 16-court days plus 20 calendar days before your court date
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Have your server mail the papers
Your server mails these papers to your spouse or other parent:
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Copy of your Request for Orders (form FL-300) and any attachments
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A blank Responsive Declaration to Request for Orders (form FL-320)
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A copy of your Income and Expense Declaration (form FL-150) (if you filed one) along with a blank one
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A copy of the completed Declaration Regarding Address Verification (form FL-334) (if you needed to use one)
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Any other papers you filed (except any fee waivers)
If your spouse or the other parent has a lawyer in this case, meaning a lawyer filed papers in the case, then your server must mail the papers to the lawyer instead.
Tell your server to write down the date they mailed the papers. Your server needs this date to fill out the Proof of Service form.
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Have your server complete the Proof of Service form
You can use Proof of Service by Mail (form FL-335).
- It helps if you fill in the top part of the form with the case and court information.
- Your server can then fill in the information about how, when, and where they mailed the papers.
- Your server must sign and date the form.
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Copy and file the Proof of Service form
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Make a copy of your Proof of Service form.
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File the original and copy with the court where you filed the papers. The court will stamp and return the copy. If you served by mail using the address verification process, you also have to file the original Declaration Regarding Address Verification (form FL-334).
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Keep the copy of the Proof of Service for your records.
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Serve your request by mail